TRAVEL TIPS II: CANUCKS’ FANS COMING TO L.A.

We gave our LA faithful travel tips for their trip to Vancouver here. Now, it is time to help our north of the border friends adjust to Los Angeles. The lakingsnews.com travel council offers the following advice:

10. The straggly looking homeless folks offering tickets are actually with the team and would appreciate you buying them a drink.

9. “Ese” is a variation of “eh” and it is also best used at the end of a sentence. For example, to the concession stand lady at Staples, “Get me a super dog and a Coors light, Ese” or to the taxi driver, “to the Spearmint Rhino, Ese.” This complimentary slang is most appreciated by young Hispanic males.

8. If you find yourself more than 3 miles from Staples Center, the buildings look grayer, windows are knocked out, and there are few street lights, your best bet is to park near an alley and find a pay phone. A request for change is best expressed by, “do you have a dime, ese?”

7. For every mile away from Staples Center that you lodge, give yourself 3 minutes extra drive time.

6. The best restaurants are tucked away in the quiet neighborhoods of South Central LA.

5. That ever expanding dark cloud as you drive south on Interstate 5 toward Orange County will follow you back to Canada. It is best to stay clear.

4. We spell centre, c-e-n-t-e-r; defence, d-e-f-e-n-s-e; offence, o-f-f-e-n-s-e; favourite without the “u”; and sucks, n-u-c-k-s.

3. A new LA ordinance allows all Vancouver residents to smoke pot in public while actively soliciting a prostitute with their partner. Unfortunately, that same ordinance doesn’t permit you to buy alcohol in any bar or restaurant after 730pm.

2. To avoid the shock of different prices and tax rates, we suggest you tip your servers 82%.

1. Kings fans are patient, kind and affable. The bigger they are, the more they enjoy a good ribbing about the team. There is nothing but love behind the scowls.



Categories: L.A. Kings News, Surly & Scribe Top 10 list

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3 replies

  1. Funny stuff!
    If you guys are going Wed. post if your meeting for drinks before the game.I’m Bringing a few friends with me and 2 of them aren’t really die hard Kingsfans,but life long friends who understand my passion(although have respectfully resisted any attemps to being fully indoctrinated).Would love to convert them over to the light side,finally.

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