KOVALCHUK II: CONTRACTUAL BOOGALOO

Story: A Russian hockey player in his prime seeks fortune from a franchise in a pre apocalyptic waste land of the eastern United States where Devils roam and cities stand in the face of economic destruction.

Plot: The young Russian, far away from home, must navigate through a series of promises and expectations while battling a legion of dark and empirical forces that stand between he and the holy covenant marked by the elusive number 100. Our hero must learn who to trust, of whom to remain weary, all the while overcoming outside forces that tempt him to return to the land of his ancestors and abandon this journey wrought with peril.

Protagonist: The Russian, Ilya Kovalchuk.

Antagonist: The reader must decide who fits this mold. There is the friend or foe, the prince who claims to lead our hero to the promise land but may be a dastardly fiend who seeks only his own selfish cause to the Russian’s end. His name is Grossman but is he man as his name proclaims or a secret and evil force’s pawn? There is the old King Lou, aged and grizzly from battles won in years past but now seeking to keep his crown and land from those who mean it harm. There is the dark and once powerful sorcerer Vanderbeek who has made financial institutions appear and disappear all the while increasing his own stranglehold on the east where the Russian seeks his fortune. King Lou has recently fallen under sorcerer Vanderbeek’s spell and is doing his bidding. Vanderbeek welcomes the Russian and has enchanted King Lou to bring him east so that he can be used to execute the sorcerer’s final plan. Finally, there is the Galactic Empire, comprised of machines who speak in tongues unfamiliar to mortals and who seek total control of everything within their reach. The Galactic Empire is ruled by part man, part cyborg known only as Bettman.

The Journey: Our hero reaches the promise land, led there by Grossman only to undergo near total destruction at the hands of the Empire. The Russian escapes and with Grossman at his side and sorcerer Vanderbeek’s spell on King Lou, he finds himself locked in battle once again. Just when all seems lost and the young Russian appears ready to break to the pressures of the homeland’s calling, Grossman helps him climb the final mountain to face off against Bettman and his seemingly impenetrable forces. This battle shall be the last. Good v. Evil. Wrong v. More Wrong. Greed v. Gumption. Who will prevail? Let us turn the page to the final chapter…



Categories: L.A. Kings News

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12 replies

  1. I hope he sees his 100 million dollar mark, and I hope it’s the Devils are the ones who give it to him. What is the offer from the KHL? Are they really offering 100 million as well? I might of missed it, but I don’t remember actually seeing one at all, just like the Islanders. It would be poetic justice if he finds no deal better than what was offered in the NHL, and that the only deal the NHL would of approved of, was the one the Kings offered.

  2. At this point could care less.

  3. lBobby, do you think we could get that cast as an episode of Family Guy? Maybe Stewie could be Kovalchuk. The end of the 48 hour timeline hits today, so let’s see if our intrepid Russian sulks on back to the Steppes for his 43 million over 3 years. I say good riddance to the whiny Cossak!

  4. Can Leiweke play Herbert the Old Man? Reaching out to the object of his affection that just doesn’t swing that way? But if that were the case, Kovalchuk would have to play Chris.

    … actually, that’s not too bad.

  5. Parise would have to be Meg. The one working so hard for acceptance only to be ignored and shunned.

    If Kovi is Stewie than the NHLPA is Brian.

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