Surly and I polled 100 medical school drop-outs (we couldn’t get any actual doctors to speak with us) and 99 of them agreed that winning is the best known cure for the following top ten ailments suffered by Kings’ fans during the past six games…

10. Sudden and uncontrolled cursing in response to anyone named Dwight

9. Chipped front teeth and unexplained imprint of said teeth on remote control

8. Responding to your wife’s question about plans for dinner with, “shoot the fucking puck Kopi!”

7. Days later, responding to your boss’ request for a file with, “the puck! The little black rubber puck!”

6. Fixed Terry Murray like facial expression with pursed lips despite pre-game reading of inspirational articles on Kings’ blogs

5. Lying awake juggling line combinations and screaming when Harrold ends up on the fourth line

4. Looking forward to the Bruins’ Sports Report after the game

3. A growing and unnecessary annoyance at Jim Fox’s hair

2. Game day superstitions with escalating masochism

and the number 1 ailment cured by winning…

1. Spontaneous weeping followed by maniacal laughter at the thought of not signing Ilya Kovalchuk