Surly and I sat for an hour trying to figure out how we could get him into the L.A. Kings holiday party.
Surly: No, I suck at making drinks.
Me: A corporate executive of some type?
Surly: I don’t own a suit…and I am not shaving.
Me: Darryl Sutter’s son?
Surly: He has a son?
Me: We could find out.
Me: Shrimp puffs!
Me: Shrimp puffs. You could break out your waiter outfit and serve shrimp puffs. Everybody loves shrimp puffs.
Surly: I don’t have a waiter outfit.
Me: Improvise! Wear what you wear around the house when you cook and clean for your girlfriend.
Surly: I will find something to wear.
Surly always finds a way and, once again, he didn’t disappoint.
Doughty: I am going to miss Terry Murray.
Johnson: How so?
Doughty: He had a great accountability system that only applied to scrubs like Richardson.
Richardson (from nearby): I heard that asshole!
Westgarth: So, what do you think my role will be with Sutter as coach?
Mitchell: What do you mean?
Westgarth: I mean, will he value my offensive upside?
Stoll: So, I hear Sutter is a yeller.
Stoll: Think that will help me score more goals?
Kopitar: Couldn’t hurt.
Brown: Any idea what it’ll be like with Darryl Sutter?
Richards: I don’t know much about him but I am guessing it will be pretty much the same for you and I.
Brown: How is that?
Richards: You know, I’ll be playing like a captain and you’ll be wearing the C.
Surly (smiling) to Dustin Brown: Shrimp puff?
Jamie Kompon to Surly: God, I am so relieved…
Surly (surprised): Mr. Kompon, how are you, sir?
Kompon: Much better now. I was just told I won’t be terminated with Sutter coming on.
Surly: Mother fu…that’s great, sir. Congratulations.
Kompon: Thank you. Now, hand me that apron and a platter of shrimp puffs, they want me to start immediately.
(Leiweke walks up to Lombardi and Stevens and hands Dean a Christmas Card)
Lombardi: Thank you, Mr. Leiweke. That is very kind of you but, really, more defense is all the gift I need.
(Leiweke walks away)
Stevens: I got a card too. He also gave me a coach of the week award, with a plaque and everything. Did he get you anything other than the card?
Lombardi: (reading card): The card says, “Merry Christmas. Hope you enjoy your gift in April.”
Stevens: That’s weird.
Lombardi: I know, right? Hey, maybe it’s more funding for the scouting department!
Leiweke (shouts from across the room): THAT’S NOT IT!
Bernier: I hope I get more games under Sutter.
Quick: Don’t worry man, you will.
Bernier: You think so?
Quick: Sure. You will get plenty of minutes whenever I give up 3 goals so you can surrender 5.
Patrick O’Neal: So, Kyle, did it feel good getting into your first fight in a while on Monday night?
O’Neal: I mean, you haven’t had nearly as many fights this season…
O’Neal: …compared to last season.
O’Neal: You are going to hurt me any second now, aren’t you?
(rough English translation of discussion in Russian)
Loktionov: These defense mind coaches are killing me. How can I make goals when I have to check, check, check and play mindless grinding style?
Voynov: That is the way it is in L.A., Andrei.
Loktionov: How you find success playing defense and score goals?
Voynov: Easy. I do opposite of that Doughty guy.
Brandon Kozun: I am here Mr. Lombardi and excited about the opportunity. Will I be playing wing on the third line or in the top six, sir?
Lombardi: Easy Brandon, all in good time. For now, I have an even bigger task for you.
Lombardi: Go stand next to that man dressed as Santa Clause. One of the elves called in sick.
Gagne (after he takes a sip of wine): You seem calm about the Darryl Sutter hiring.
Williams: Doesn’t affect me a bit.
Gagne: You are that confident?
Williams: Doesn’t matter who is coaching, I’m still the best looking guy on this team.
Fraser: You look nervous.
Penner: I am terrified.
Fraser: The new coach thing has you worried?
Penner: We have a new coach?
Fraser: Well…yeah, are you serious?
Penner: I had no idea.
Fraser: Then what are you nervous about?
Surly (running back): I found another platter of shrimp puffs, Mr. Penner.
Penner: Oh, thank God.
Hunter: Have you seen Greener?
Lewis: I haven’t seen him. Davis, have you seen Matt Greene?
Drewiske (points): Here he comes…
Matt Greene (naked, running across the room): Streaaaakiiiing!
Scuderi: You are a good defenseman, Alec. You will get more playing time.
Martinez: Thanks, man. I appreciate it. You think it will happen soon?
Scuderi: Right after you are traded, I am sure.
John Stevens (to Bill Ranford): Hey, watch this. (Yells across the room) HEY KOMPON! WHAT DO WE HAVE TO DO THE NEXT GAME TO IMPROVE THE POWERPLAY?
Jamie Kompon (yells back while holding a platter of shrimp puffs): JUST GET MORE PUCKS TO THE NET!
Mrs. Lombardi: Honey, can you get off the phone so we can enjoy the party?
Dean Lombardi: (puts hand over the phone and whispers to his wife): I am talking with Lamoriello.
Mrs. Lombardi: About what?
Dean Lombardi: Parise…(back on the phone). Yes, Lou, I understand but it’s the best I can do…great, think it over and let me know. Talk with you later this week. (Hangs up phone)
Mrs. Lombardi: Well?
Dean Lombardi: I offered him Jack Johnson, Jarret Stoll, Bobby Scribe and a 1st.
Mrs. Lombardi: Bobby Scribe?
Dean Lombardi (Scowls): Yes. If Zach Parise is coming here, that fucker Scribe will not get to enjoy it.