Helene Elliott tweeted yesterday:

Sutter said Dustin Penner texted him this morning and said he had a sore back and couldn’t walk.

What you don’t know and hasn’t been reported are the texts Dustin Penner considered sending to Darryl Sutter but decided not to as to why he couldn’t play yesterday afternoon. Fortunately for you, we tracked those down.

Terry Murray and I were out late, partying. He’s on the patio, puking and I can’t find my pants.

We’re playing Columbus. If you can’t beat them without me, we’re screwed anyway.

It was either this or that. I chose this. Fuck that.

Forgot it was an afternoon game. Leaving Spearmint Rhino now.

Need a couple of months to get in shape. See you after the trading deadline.

Got a bet with Surly & Scribe as to whether the fans will cheer my announcement as a healthy scratch or not.

Not coming back until Jamie Kompon is fired.

Your hugging is making me uncomfortable.

Trying out for the El Cid Lounge Softball league.