“Your Friggin’ (butt) Is Up In The Air”?

I hate Rich Hammond’s parentheses. I want to beat him over the head each time he does it. After the game against the St. Louis Blues, we got this from twiggy.

(on struggling with breakout passes…)

SUTTER: “First period, it’s tough to make the first pass when your friggin’ (butt) is up in the air, from getting knocked on it. After that, we were fine.’’

What? The word used clearly was not “butt”. Hammond’s Amish filter on Insider either reframed the word “ass” or Rich has some fucked up idea of an ass synonym. Good grief, I hope he isn’t using antonyms. This is the problem with censorship. The filter kills the message.

Back to the quote. Let’s assume Rich’s fetish didn’t exist and the quote actually was, “it’s tough to make the first pass when your friggin’ ass is in the air, from getting knocked on it.”


I feel like I am in high school, the teacher just said something really dumb and I am the only one who caught it…but I’m concerned about raising my hand and asking the question because there is a possibility I somehow missed something and it isn’t the teacher’s statement that was dumb but the question I am about to ask.

So, at the risk of asking something that may mirror the above, “excuse me, Darryl, why would the ass be in the air, from getting knocked on it?”

Ass. In the air. I googled it and didn’t get much help.

Could he mean, “it’s tough to make the first pass when your friggin’ ass is on the ice, from getting knocked on it.”

That would make sense.

I am running with that until someone points out what I am obviously missing.

Until then, let’s enjoy something that comes without parentheses or ambiguity

Categories: L.A. Kings News

Tags: ,

10 replies

  1. I blame the LA Kings Insider autocorrect!

    • . . . and while we’re at it, the word “boobs” should never be used instead of “tits”, “butt” instead of “ass”, “ass” instead of “asshole”, and “pee” instead of “piss”.

      I’m tired of all these pussyfooting, chickenshit, quiche-eating, crypto-euphemisms.

      I’m willing to tolerate — albeit with considerable discomfort — “cock” instead of “dick” on RARE occasions, but “screw” instead of “fuck”? Never.

  2. You took that pic with your cell didn’t you, you lucky bastard?

  3. I think he was talking about waves in air, but I could be wrong. And what Bobby means by ‘yes…no…’ is that yes, it was taken by a cell phone, but no, not his…it was mine. You’re welcome.

  4. If the word used in the answer was “ass” then Hammond has not quoted Sutter. He negates quoting by changing the exact statement.
    Last time I checked, the word “ass” is not considered vulgar or offensive, and Rich’ job is to ask questions, quote a question or response with 100% accuracy, regardless of words used in the interview. Why would he have a recorder, like every other beat writer so they make sure they write-up exactly what was said by all participants.
    Hammond is a wet noodle, who has been told by the Kings what he can and cant say or report. Either he still does not understand the game, or he just is clueless to ask the right questions.
    I think we get enough of this garbage from our GM who never seems to give an real answer when asked a question. Lombardi is a master at BS, and dances around questions, where he talks so much, never giving an answer, while everyone has already forgot what the question was anyway.
    Hammond is a bad investigatory journalist and he wouldn’t even be a good eugoogoolizer.
    Hammond is just some puppet, who has the job title of “insider”. I guess this is why Helene Elliott tends to get so much grief from the Kings, because she has no filter, because she is not a Kings employee.
    Helene has screwed up more than a few times reporting things which had not been verified (Kovalchuk), but at least she can report exact quotes, within the guidelines of the words you can and can’t use.

    • You don’t expect Woodstein-style journalism from Hammond. That’s not his job and I don’t blame him for lacking depth (and even accuracy) in what he reports.

      If he dances around direct questions and hems-and-haws like an organizational asslick, that’s his role. We all gotta do shit we don’t like to put food on the table.

      But Rich won’t lemme say, “Lamoriello can kish mir in loch arein” or “Suck my dick, Tambellini” on the Kings Insider.

      Freedom of expression — especially freedom of diction — is not merely useful to a blog-site. It is essential.

      Surly & Scribe are a coupla low-class shitheads, but they do understand this much.

      They also make good rhetorical use of cheesecake photos.

      • I think it is offensive to say low-class shitheads, because that is redundant and redundancy is not tolerated. I repeat, redundancy is not, umm, put up with. Neither is repeating yourself.


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