Win! Kings Win! Kings Fucking Beat The Stars 4-2…

Chuck Norris is proud.

He doesn’t smile often, but when he does, he means it. Tonight, Chuck Norris is smiling. Not because Andrei Loktionov scored his second goal in as many games (who didn’t love that Lokti smile and the point to his leg after the puck went in!), not because Dwight King got his first NHL goal and not even because Jordan Nolan got his first! No, Chuck is happy because the Kings won. They fucking won a game. A game where they were kind of outplayed, had a bit of luck on their side and bent, but never broke.

We were due.

…oh look, Fox Sports West went right to some baseball history program thirty seconds after the game ended…have I mentioned Fox Sports, Prime Ticket and generally all hockey coverage on television in Southern California sucks? I think I have.

If I can gripe about one thing or, better written, one player, it is Dustin Brown. Where was he? Did he decide to take Sunday off? He wasn’t skating, he wasn’t hitting, he wasn’t hustling, he looked like a smaller version of Dustin Penner out there. Brown was no Bruce Lee tonight. But speaking of Penner…fuck Penner. I know we should be showcasing him right now and sitting him is probably not the best way of doing that (maybe they are trying to avoid injury before we ship him off for a conditional draft pick) but fuck his inconsistent play and general pancake eating demeanor.

Man, I am all over the place today. Back to the game.

So, I heard 4 separate virgins have popped their cherries against the Dallas Stars this season. Westgarth, Voynov, King and Nolan. That right there boys and girls is called a “train” and three out of the four probably left a mark or two. Hey, if they, the Stars, are going to act like tramps, we might as well treat them like it. So long as it is consensual.

My Mr. Miyagi inspired three L.A Kings stars

3. Rob Scuderi

2. Jordan Nolan

1. Dwight King

Now, you may be asking yourself, “what the hell, Scribe! Where are the women?”

I am glad you asked…

An Ugly Woman



Categories: L.A. Kings News

Tags: , , , ,

18 replies

  1. awesome article Bobby!

  2. A win is a win is a win.

    Maybe they can call up two new guys from Manchester every game.

    Fuck it all…..wanna see some changes come trade deadline. Trade anybody but Kopitar, Quick, or Voynov, I don’t give a fuck. Fuck everybody. If the fans wanna mutiny well right the fuck ahead. Tired of watching this weak ass shit with these weak ass dissapointments. Where the fuck are you Brown? Fuck I’ve talked enough shit about the rest.

    My all time favorite player was the great Avalanche / King Adam Deadmarsh. Worshiped him, emulated him on the ice. Man, fucker had heart. Now? Nothing. Nothing but shit in its place. Reading this fucking blog expecting some sort of enlightenment to my frustration. I mean, you know, still the best Kings blog out there, don’t get me wrong but I remain unfulfilled.

    Now, off I go to the great beyond…….

  3. My favorite part was when Ott took a run at Richards and smashed his own face into the boards instead. That warmed my heart.

  4. Geeezusss that IS the ugliest chick I’ve ever seen! :D

  5. “But speaking of Penner…fuck Penner. I know we should be showcasing him right now and sitting him is probably not the best way of doing that (maybe they are trying to avoid injury before we ship him off for a conditional draft pick) but fuck his inconsistent play and general pancake eating demeanor” Amen brother!

  6. What’s better than a Kings win? A Kings win in front of the most obnoxious boisterous piece of shit drunk Stars fan who didn’t have a single thought he didn’t express to the entirety of section 326. Then when the empty netter was scored he lowered himself to cussing with many kids around. That’s what happens when you arrive drunk and keep drinking throughout the game.
    As always, I high-fived a handful of Kings fans on the way out.
    Go Kings go!

  7. Guys….. please do not post the results of a game in the title… I recorded the game and just got home. Started the playback and checked my emails…. needless to say I now know the outcome…..

    • ha ha. Sorry man, but we have been doing that for 2 years. One thing I do when I miss a game, I don’t touch my computer, I don’t check my phone, nothing. I am on total electronic silence until the game is done. By the way, I totally fucked up Surly’s night too on accident because he had the game taped and I sent him a text regarding the post game. lol. You should have seen his mini tantrum via text back. Good times.

  8. I was at the game tonight…3 rows from the ice next to the Kings bench. Awesome time. Was pretty disappointed in Richards’ game as well. Few plays I felt he gave up or slowed down way too soon. Quick made some great saves tonight.

    Great 2 points.

    • Richards effort set up the third goal.
      What are you talking about?

      • The wicked no look backhand pass aside, Richie has been a mere shell of himself since his concussion. It’s not so much his point production as is his compete level. He’s a warrior, just not since his concussion.

        With that said, that pass for the game winner was pretty sick.

      • Jason,

        That was a nice play by Richards to set up that goal. But, that doesn’t excuse his lack of effort on other plays…

        I love the guy, don’t get me wrong, but I think he needs to be showing a bit more out there.

  9. Really happy, especially with the SJ loss too. If these fucks don’t take advantage of the sharks and their road trip I am going postal. We have it primed lubes an ready to go to take over the division and 3rd spot. And possibly make up ground on the the games at hand they have. Put together a string of wins mother fuckers!!!!

  10. How do I post a new subject/topic?
    Thank you ahead of time.

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