Kings Step on Their Collective Dicks, Lose to Oilers 2-1 in OT

Don’t have much left in the tank…

0 for 18 on the powerplay in three games. 0 for 18. Fuck off.

Send Mike Richards back to eastern Canada to do more ice fishing. He’s not ready for prime time yet. He handles the puck like a heterosexual male handles a stranger’s dick in his hands.

Hey Kyle Clifford was great, again.

Jonathan Quick. Love you man. You really miss Willie Mitchell. So do we.

First line? What first line?

Take more penalties, boys. Take more penalties.

I am out of energy…

Oh and fuck you Surly. He predicted in the pregame a 2-1 OT loss.

Categories: L.A. Kings News

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65 replies

  1. On the plus side, games like these allow me to enjoy the incredible amount of blow-it-up bitchfest-iness that goes on at the Insider blog.

  2. 4.7 seconds left and they couldn’t fuckin’ do it. I didn’t even think the Kings deserved the point they got. I think they look very sloppy and lackluster, except Clifford.

  3. I know we’re the reigning champs but this sucks… I don’t understand how such a talented group of forwards can’t score. I love Cliffy y Nolan

  4. The boys did not want to play this year. Instead they wanted to enjoy life and spend the bucks they make. I kind of had a sneaky thought lingering in my mind that they were going to have that so-called post-championship rigor mortis syndrome. Maybe they need some B-12 shots. Have them stop off at the 7-11 for some 5 hr energy shots too.

    • … Blaming this on some sort of “post Cup hangover” is ridiculous, just saying.

      Really, the first 8 or 9 or so of these games should be exhibition games. I know they count, because fans are impatient for competitive NHL hockey and owners/players are impatient about making that money. But they absolutely should not count, and gleaning anything of substance from these games is impossible. What I’m seeing from a lot of the fans is disrespect for the process of getting ready for the season. Yes, coaches/GMs know who they want on the roster before training camp starts, and they know the guys who they want to fill those key roles. And yes, some guys need training camp more than other guys. But, collectively, teams need this time. You can have all the blueprints ready and know what you want to build, but you need time to BUILD it. The fact of the matter is that the 2013 Kings aren’t even built yet.

      Another fact of the matter is that panic set in for a lot of the fans from the moment they found out the season would only be 48 games. Now, with the team at 0-3, the panic has risen to a fever pitch. If those fans would simply step back and realize they’re hysterical over just three games, and exhibition-level games at that, they would be better off – but I doubt that’ll happen. Sports media outlets will only feed this hysteria … witness this very site, wondering out loud if there’s going to be a trade. Would you trade someone based on performance in exhibition games? Of course not. So, why would you consider doing it now? It’s just crazy talk. I understand there have been injuries to defensemen. So what? That’s part of the game. Some poor judgment calls by the management of this team have been exposed. So what? They were bound to be exposed. There are now spots open for two young and inexperienced defensemen; guys the organization apparently believe in. OK. So, use them. Let them learn.

      The Kings finished with an eighth seed last season. They won the playoffs as a dominating, elite, incredible team. Which are the real Kings? I’d venture to say the answer lies somewhere in between. The cream will rise to the top, in time. If they run out of time before the effects of the rise are felt, that’s the breaks. But, I don’t believe they will run out of time. I believe we’re looking at a situation where the Kings, if they’re healthy from this moment forward, are looking at about a 4 or 5 seed in the West by season’s end. They’re about 4 or 5 points behind the teams in those seeds right now, and there are 45 games left. More than enough time, right? Why panic?

      There’s no reason for passion to overcome principle at this time. Keep it in perspective. See the situation now for what it is. That’s all I can say about it.

  5. Last year that defense first foundation was laid so strong and girthy that once the offense got going the balance was struck. It seems this year the collective defensive structure has been seriously diminished. Granted Mitchell and now green are out and it looked much better this game, but it needs major attention.
    They need to go back to basics. At times during this game they looked like they were allowing huge gaps in coverage and were barely hanging on. Lack of real camp is really showing.

  6. Holy fuck, this team is ass. Then again, how can one complain when these same guys just won the Stanley Cup? How can I sit here and say things like Brown looks to be in full retard mode. Mike Richards looks too sober to be playing.. he’s more effective drunk. Trevor Lewis and his stick need to go fuck themselves. Stoll… you piece of shit… you slow ass, can’t win a f/o to save your dick…can’ do much of anything else it seems…it’s your frickin fault that penalty was called in OT. Dwight King, you look slower than shit from a constipated pig.

    How can I sit here and think these things? FUck!

  7. This….fucking….sucks!!!!

  8. Bobby, I have never laughed harder at one of your articles. Thanks for providing that in the midst of this train wreck.

    • Hmm. I am guessing the dick line got you…you sick bastard.

      • The dick line sucks. you r the only one who finds it amusing. You should go suck a bag o dicks. ha! (courtesy of fat asshole who is funny). seriously give me a diagram, valid critizim. teach. love yah. but suck that bag o dicks.

      • Yeah, you’re probably right. The overall pissed-off tone of the article was overly amusing, but yes, the dick line had me rolling.

  9. 0-18. The Boob is back. Where is Hymen Kompon when you need him?

  10. If you’ve paid attention and lived for the Kings going back almost to the begining….you would realize that the cup victory was a karmic moment of balancing the books. They definitely earned it, but let’s face it….they
    had a great run at exactly the right time and everyone was rewarded with what we the fans and all those Kings players of the past could only dream of….the Cup…the Championship…..bragging rights…..but this is another season and things will get back to normal…just be glad you witnessed it in your lifetime. This year will bring back memories of all those non-cup years….plus, this next Cup will have an astrix next to it because of the shortened season….Let some other teamhave this one… will always be tainted. Next year however, might be a very different story.

  11. Fuckin Richards looked like a lazy ass bum out there tonight, half-ass attempt at the empty net and just turns it over, then takes his sweet ass time getting to the bench when we get hit for too many men on the ice… disappointing as fuck

    • Preach it brother. He looks like Penner circa Terry Murray era

    • Half the blame needs to fall on Stoll’s bitch ass as well… He jumps on the ice when Richard’s drunk ass wasn’t even at center ice yet.

      • Richards sucked balls the entire game…he’s fallen in love with that stupid ass shot from the goal line on the PP just cause it worked twice in the playoffs last year. Then he misses the goddamn net wide and clears the puck out of the zone himself.

  12. While I do hate losing, I also think 3 games is too small a sample size to go on a total rampage. That goal with 4.7 seconds would be a non issue if the Kings could score on the fucking power play though. I could care less about Kings penalties but for Christ sake fix the PK. It looks like ass.

    • Preach it, brother.

      …..yeah, continue to lay it on thick.

      Richards is not a drunk (me either) .

      Carter is not a drunk (me either).

    • Think about it though… Shortened season plus every game is within the conference… To me, every loss and every win counts double. They need to figure it out quickly before they’re stuck at the bottom and every team is OTL getting points every game and they can’t ascend

  13. Ok, I have some observations:

    Quick, Doughty, and Scuderi looked not quite at game speed for the first 30 minutes of the season. They’ve been lights out ever since.

    Our D is definitely missing some grit with both Greene and Mitchell out. Sounds like Mitchell is close and that should help a ton.

    Most of our forwards just plain look like they aren’t thinking at game speed yet. Richards is the worst of them. He looks like he thinks he’s at home watching the game instead of playing in it. He seems to be in observer mode. Even most of our defensive issues have started with the lack of a backcheck. I have a sense that it is getting a little better every game and we will be steamrolling teams again in another week.

    Clifford wasn’t himself last year, after the concussion issues and everything, and maybe a bit of a sophomore slump? But hoo-boy he looks awesome now. Thing is, I have a funny feeling that this isn’t a hot streak. Are we seeing Clifford break out?

  14. Finally watched the highlights of the game.

    Glad I missed it… I would have been livid. Now its just kinda funny, in that sad sort of way.

    Richards blew it on the game winner and hilariously, even fucked up on our one goal. Terrible clearing play by Richards saved by an awesome play Clifford, who I said before the seaosn began would be a monster this year. He’s getting at least 15g 20a. My man.

    Brush it off. Kings are just remembering how to play angry. Saturday night will not be a Fun night to be a Coyote fan.

    • How come nobody is talking about that bullshit whistle in the second that screwed us out of a goal? I realize that our shitty powerplay and Richie not burying the game winner in the third are the main reasons we lost. However, let’s not forget that early whistle in the second when Dubnyk clearly did not have it covered and it went in, but an ealry whistle fucked us! I will admit my outrage is 75% wanted to be pissed at someone other than our own players but still, fuck that bullshit!

  15. Whistle-schmistle. They were on PP for nearly a period.
    This blog is getting homo-erotic. What up?

  16. Game 3, no real training camp, guys coming back from playing in paying beer leagues in Europe, while others are out someplace ice fishing or fishing, maybe trolling bars.
    Clifford is playing well, but don’t start proclaiming or thinking he is the next Milan Lucic, he looks good because the rest of his team for the most part are still on vacation.
    Quick is nearly there, but Sutter needs to get Bernier in that net before he aggravates his L5/L4 and undoes that microdiscectomy (yes he has more disc that can herniate and cause him pain again, except next time it gets that bad its fusion time).
    Sutter is starting to call out those players who he has not seen a full effort from, so expect more guys becoming healthy scratches if they continue to look like they have.
    Its not defense that is the problem, its scoring, stupid too many men on the ice penalties and not taking advantage of the powerplay.
    The Kings need to fix this very soon, if they plan on beating some of these teams, they really shouldn’t be losing to.
    I keep hearing people moan about Gagne not being in the line-up. I am not sure if he is playing hurt or his -3 in game #1 is what Sutter is not happy with. Regardless, personally I think Gagne isn’t going to be the player they were hoping to get after the injury problems started when he was with Florida and then his post concussion issues last season.
    09/10 GP 58 G 17 A 23
    10/11 GP 63 G 17 A 23
    11/12 GP 34 G 7 A 10
    Gagne isn’t a 3rd or 4th line wing, and if he isn’t being used on the 1st or 2nd lines, then its a waste of a roster space to use him on the PP solely.
    Kopitar/Williams/Brown well, Kopitar had an excuse, but maybe Brown is having a hard time getting used to the NHL speed vs the Swiss Elite League, and Williams is way out of sync right now, especially since he is a finesse type of player.
    Carter and Richards, well I’m thinking Richards needs a Kardashian slump buster, so if someone could contact Kris Jenner and arrange one of her other daughters who should be of age now to prostitute, please do so, remember Timmy said Dean had the green light to spend money.
    Maybe they can get a 2 for 1 with Kris Jenner the other daughter or both, I don’t think Mike or Jeff to particular about which one gets which, or maybe they can tag team.
    Stoll now this guy has pretty much fucked every B and C listed “actress” in Hollywood. You don’t want to piss off Gretzky so stay the fuck away from his Paulina otherwise Semenko is coming after his ass. Maybe someone can call Kathy Hilton and have Nikki or Paris or both come down to the beach crib and do the deed for his slump buster, but someone do something quick!
    Mitchell was cleared to play, however he is a little apprehensive about getting back on the ice because he is still experiencing swelling, even if the doctors/trainers have assured him, it will go away once he gets himself back on the ice playing in games.
    With the return of Mitchell, hopefully Sutter goes back to putting at least 2 defensive pairs back together Mitchell/Voynov, Scuderi/Doughty, its what to do with Martinez/Muzzin/Drewiske/Bodnarchuk. I would guess Muzzin and Martinez and Drewiske and Bodnarchuk being the 3rd and 4th pairings.
    I love seeing all the pissing and moaning people are doing, on facebook, or other social media outlets. I don’t read the insider, it was a joke before with Hammond and I took a peek and not much has changed other than not so many people kissing Rich for absolutely nothing other than being a court reporter for Dean Lombardi, but its pretty much a new set of people who think they know all of the answers and the old reliable participants who they try to impress.
    Bernier for Subban was the one I heard last night, and I was laughing out so loud I almost pissed myself! It amazes me the mind of a lot of these “fans” and their quick and poorly thought out answers, especially when it comes to a trade.
    Keep jumping off the bus people, its nice to have some leg room now that the bandwagon has left the station.
    Good thing about facing Phoenix next is Jason Labarbera he was the Kings late Xmas gift last season, and time to light him up again!
    Bernier for Subban BWAHHHHHHHHHH!

  17. “He handles the puck like a heterosexual male handles a stranger’s dick in his hands.”

    Oooooookay, then.

  18. With how shitty our power play has looked I woudn’t mind seeing Toffoli brought up to get a shot at things….not like any of our other forwards are doing shit on the PP except Kopi.

  19. I wanted to see how the Kings are doing and I witnessed last night’s shit stain of a game.

    I think that’s the most penalties I’ve ever seen called for one game.

    Richards done pissed me off when he, like a fucking moron, just limp wristed the open netter. No real hustle to try and get around the defender to get a better shot or at least try and take time off the clock.

  20. I think I saw Clifford killing penalties out there. Wasn’t that 13# making a great block and clearing of the puck. Clifford came to play? Clearly he wants to be a hockey player and a great one. Lets see him score 30, and play the PP and PK every game. 4th line doing it all right now. Well, the people who started on the 4th line pre-season.

    Mitchell was the MVP of the team last year. Nobody listened but goddamn it’s true.

    What the fuck was that ridiculous celebration for the tying goal? I was like, what the fuck? Do you think you just won the Stanley Cup or something? Get real.

    • Well he did just score to tie the game versus the pretend— err i mean, defending Stanley Cup champs with 4 seconds left. I’d be pretty stoked about that.

    • Mitchell was the MVP of the team last year. Nobody listened but goddamn it’s true.

      … Mitchell wasn’t even the best defenseman on the team last season. He’s a helluva player, and I respect him. But let’s not get carried away.

      The Kings have scored 4 goals in 3 games. That’s why they’re 0-3. Is their offense struggling because Willie Mitchell isn’t playing? Of course not.

      • Mitchell was for a fact by far the best Defensman on the team last year. Doughty only played a quarter of the season and playoffs so that rules him out. Do you mean Voynov? Actually, Mitchell playing on D has a lot to do with the O because players are not worried about taking a few extra chances and he has a great head for the game, even in things like dumpins and breakout and cross ice passes. I’m not necessarily saying that they would have scored more goals but the possibility is there especially giving Doughty more flexibility to try things.

        Mitchell is the MVP in my eyes. Quick looks much more human without him. I don’t know why suckers simply don’t understand.

  21. Mitchell was for a fact by far the best Defensman on the team last year.

    … BY FAR??? Seriously, man? See, I don’t want to go back and forth on this for long (and I won’t) but this is just the most ridiculous type of comment. This is a HF boards comment. They do this over there all the time – or they did when I was there, anyway. They’ll be all “, AINEC”. All the damn time.

    Doughty only played a quarter of the season and playoffs so that rules him out.

    … Doughty played in one more game than Mitchell did last season, and he played around 240 more minutes than Mitchell did – the equivalent of four more games. So first, you’re not fact-checking.

    Doughty played against tougher competition than Mitchell did during the season (which stands to reason, as Doughty was on the top pairing and Mitchell wasn’t) and started his shifts in the defensive zone more often than Mitchell did. Even with the tougher minutes, Doughty was driving the play in a positive direction more than Mitchell was.

    In the playoffs, Mitchell was facing slightly better competition than Doughty did, and Mitchell paid for it with his overall effectiveness. No Kings’ defenseman started his shifts more often in the defensive zone than Doughty did, and Drew still held his own. He (or Kopitar) was the REAL MVP of the 2012 Playoffs. But since the mainstream media guys generally didn’t understand what they were watching and were too lazy to do any fact checking, they voted a different way. They jumped on a bandwagon. That’s what they do.

    Actually, Mitchell playing on D has a lot to do with the O

    … The number one reason why the Kings are struggling offensively is because they have yet to score on the power play. Nobody is going to say “the power play sure needs a defensive defenseman like Willie Mitchell on it” unless they’re trolling.

    I’m not necessarily saying that they would have scored more goals but the possibility is there especially giving Doughty more flexibility to try things.

    … Doughty??? Mitchell doesn’t play with Doughty. Scuderi has, and does.

    Quick looks much more human without him.

    … Quick’s save percentage last season when Mitchell was on the ice at 5-on-5 was .944, best among all Kings’ defensemen. So, that seems to look pretty good, until you realize that the season before last, Quick’s save percentage was just .913 with Mitchell on the ice, the WORST among all Kings’ defensemen.

    So, it’s one of two things. Either, Mitchell didn’t know how to make his goalie look better before last season, or it’s mostly a random chance type of thing. I’m going with random chance.

    Mitchell’s always been a solid defensive player. I respect him. He played great last season. Anyone who knows the game understands what he brought to the table, and anyone who doesn’t know the game doesn’t matter. There’s no need to exaggerate about his contribution to the Kings. I don’t know what you’re going for with this argument you’re making, but it couldn’t be more factually wrong.

    • Yeah, by far and a lot of others saw it my way too. Mitchell won massively as Kings best Dman on Insider. Voynov did better in the voting than Doughty. What i meant by saying Doughty only played a “quarter of the season”, is because that’s exactly how many games he showed up in, both physically and spiritually.

      The Quick S% state is skewed because of the amount of time Mitchell spent on the PK and playing in that shut down role. No disrespect, but I just didn’t see that much greatness out of Doughty last season. He has it in him but Willie is the man I trust right now.

      • Yeah, by far and a lot of others saw it my way too. Mitchell won massively as Kings best Dman on Insider.

        … OK, a site with a lot of ignorant people which was run by a guy who didn’t even like hockey. Awesome, cool story, epic troll, or whatever you’re going for here. Don’t care.

        The Quick S% state is skewed because of the amount of time Mitchell spent on the PK and playing in that shut down role.

        … The examples I gave were from 5-on-5 play. Click the links and you’ll see that. Or, don’t. Have fun.

  22. @zyklonne: Obviously you are new to this forum. Lets get one thing clear right now. This is not “Kings Insider” (duh right you are probably saying to yourself), and most of us aren’t sheep who believe the bullshit that usually is posted in that forum.

    If you want to come here and tell all of us how you think your opinion or an opinion that 100 others gave you a pat on the back for making, it might be best for you to go back to the Kings Insider.

    This forum is unplugged and not moderated by some dickhead who won’t tolerate people using “FUCK” “BITCH” “SHIT” and a bunch of other words George Carlin told us were not ok to use.

    If you are going to make a comment, which someone will show you is not accurate with facts, then again, go back to Kings Insider.

    One thing I do know is this, you better have your ducks in a row (figure of speech) if you are going to make an argument for something you have posted or someone else has posted, otherwise you will be called upon to prove whatever it is you stated.

    “Yeah, by far and a lot of others saw it my way too. Mitchell won massively as Kings best Dman on Insider.”


    Then piss off and go back to that forum, This is not “INSIDER”.

    In fact “INSIDER” is an OXYMORON and the guy who was in charge of it posted what the Kings told him to post and never had a clue what the fuck was going on anyways.

    I’ve made comments in the past and I’ve been corrected or shown by JT that maybe my math was a little off, but it was only for him to show me, maybe I wasn’t seeing the bigger picture.

    Go back to posting your line combinations and other nonsense, and taking whatever someone is posting as gospel.

    In this forum, we like to use potty mouth humor, and we say what we feel, but if we are going to make a statement about this player being better than that player or something that can be proven with the facts, we know there will be a fact checker, and if there is something that someone points out is not correct, we live and learn.

    BTW: Quick was the teams MVP last season. He put that team on his back literally, it was such a heavy burden he had to have L5/L4 surgically fixed because of that.

    If you need me to show you the numbers to bolster my claim then I will:

    69 Games played W 35 L 21 SV% 929 GAA 1.95 SO 10

    • Listen bitch. I don’t know who you are or who you think you are but you can GO FUCK YOURSELF. I say what the fuck I want based on what I see. If your boyfriend J.T. and I don’t agree I understand that you must step in to defend his honor. I know what a romantic relationship is all about, been there. Now then, Go fuck yourself while J.T. is at work and then you can go fuck him in the Ass when he returns. Or is it him that usually does the fucking. Well, your both bitches so I’m sure you take turns. Now go back to Insider and spread the word that the only knowledgeable people are those here at S&S and begone faggot!


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