Unpopular Opinions About Regehr, Toffoli, Penner and Other Shit That May Piss You Off

“Warrior”. We have used it in the past and I openly affixed it to Willie Mitchell before we first signed him and demanded we do so.

Robyn Regehr…yeah, it’s not coming to me. Look, I didn’t start following hockey 4 years ago. It’s been 3 decades. So go fuck yourself with the “but he’s exactly what we need”, “he’s a defensive defenseman”, “Greene and Mitchell are out”, “my pussy hurts”, I know why you want him here but this isn’t 2004. This isn’t the Robyn Regehr I remember so well from Calgary who proudly wore the A, punished opposing forwards, defended the crease with the vigilance of Willie Mitchell and the strength of Matt Greene. This is a 32 year old defenseman who is on the decline and is a stop-gap to add a veteran presence and stability for this season…and that may be about it because he’s also a free agent after this season and you know some asshole GM is going to pay him $4 million per season for 4 more years.

So unless Willie Mitchell’s career is over and is retiring, we may have just acquired a rental at the mother sutting price of two 2nd round draft picks in 2014 and 2015. Yeah, yeah, we got something like 9 picks this season and none of them are a 1st rounder. Two 2nd rounders are a hell of a lot to pay for Regehr, even if the D crop is low and even lower come UFA time, which brings me back to my point that someone will overpay this guy and then you will all come back to this article and write, “Oh Scribe, you are so smart, can I buy you a beer” and I will say NO…actually, I’ll say yes but I will do so with a scowl.

Hey, maybe we can trade Penner to get some of those picks…what, what, what, Dustin Penner is on IR! Right before the trade deadline!! With a fucking lower body injury!!! I am sure THAT is just a coincidence but of course I am reminded there ARE NO COINCIDENCES, said Freud who was so coked out that he had to be right, right? RIGHT?

After much consideration, I don’t want to burn a year of Tyler Toffoli’s contract. Send him back down to Manchester. He got a cup of coffee, I love the kid and I want him to tear up the AHL. (Update: one of our readers claims it won’t burn a year. If he is right, then Toffoli is a keeper and we still overpaid for Regehr)

Back to Regehr, the one good thing about the motor scooter is he can hit and holy shit is Ales Hemsky fucked when we play the Oilers this Saturday. If you don’t know, Regehr has a serious hard-on for the soft Czech. You would think Hemsky made slow, sweet love to Regehr’s wife but it’s all over a hit from years ago where the pussy Hemsky lifted his stick into Regehr’s throat when Robyn was going in for a hit…you know, normally if you heard two guys named Robyn and Ales didn’t like each other, you would think there would be some slap fighting and name calling but, this one is for real. Take a look.

So he can beat up a pussy from the Oilers. That isn’t worth two 2nd round picks.

We expect Matt Greene back in a month or so. Has anyone asked why the hell Greene didn’t have the surgery in the offseason? Was the 6 months not enough time? Was it suffered during the first game of this season?

Two second rounders…awesome. If we win the Cup again this season, it will have been worth it. Hope Regehr at least stays healthy…before we lose him in the offseason.



Categories: L.A. Kings News

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32 replies

  1. Greene was injured the first game of the season

    • Prove it! Seriously, do you have a link for that because I have not seen it?

      • I was at the game and didn’t see where the injury occurred. Thought it was odd he wasn’t on the ice

      • Even NHL tough guys would rather let their bodies heal than force a surgery that may not help. Surgery is why Quick can’t put himself in that crab position any more. He played better injured cause he knew how much pain to expect. I had a back surgery, I can’t even pick my kids up unless they jump into my arms. When he does come back, expect noticeable changes.

  2. Greene got hurt in the first game of the season.

    • Greene was injured before the season. At the open practice at Staples, that cluster fuck they used to get us down there, thinking we were going to see a scrimmage, well Greene fell funny into the boards.
      It was an awkward fall, but it wasn’t a fall that would appear to fuck up a disk in his back.
      A little medical education for you taken from first hand knowledge:
      If he tweaked his back, and had no previous injury to that disk, he doesn’t have surgery right away to fix it.
      A doctor isn’t going to throw you under the knife, unless all other options have been tried and not worked out.
      Quick played with a herniated L5/L4 which for a goalie, fuckin sucks! An injury like that, the disk gets crushed by the bone, and pain shoots down to your calf or down to your ankle, not to mention makes you walk around like the Elephant Man!
      Not knowing how far out the disk protruded, it must have been a pretty nice herniation but not something he would have in 1 game, then under the knife so soon.
      1st option would be PT.
      2nd option would be epidurals
      3rd would be a less intense procedure a microdiscectomy which means requires them to cut into his spine cut off the portion of the disk that is protruding, then get that nerve that is being pinched out of where it is, clean out that area the disk goes through the bone, so it gives him relief and at the same time gives him some room for in case he re-injures that same disk.
      PT after the surgery, and hopefully that fixes the problem.
      If after that, he still has problems with that same disk, then its time to fuse that area, which can be a one disk fusion or more.

  3. Dude, relax. The Kings will get one of those 2nd rounders back, and a better positioned 2nd rounder when we deal Martinez or Ellerby and then in the offseason Lombardi will rape someone for Bernier or Quick. Would you have rather Lombardi paid two 2nd rounders for Douglas Murray? Regehr now leads the Kings in blocked shots!

  4. Like it or not, if he takes out Hemsky, and Doughty smacks Taylor Hall around some more, hell, maybe Jake Muzzin will take out Yakapov, that is worth the price of admission alone.

    • Oh yeah, don’t fuck with Regehr, dude was born in Brazil and he’ll slap on a arm-bar or rear naked choke and you’ll be taping like that pussy Rosival or whatever his name was.

  5. I can’t tell if you don’t think Regehr makes us a better team or if you just think Lombardi overpaid. Please tell me you aren’t one of these people that thinks Ellerby or Drewiske are better options than Regehr.

    And I don’t really give a shit what other teams overpay for him in the offseason. I’m concerned with right now, this year’s playoffs, and I didn’t hear of any other better options for defensemen out there. Is two second round picks a high price? Sure. Is it something that seriously jeopardizes the organizational depth of the Kings, hurts us significantly down the road, whether we resign Regehr or not? No way.

    Since when are you mocking those with an opinion you’ve held yourself ALL season long? No one has complained about the pain their vagina feels from Greene and Mitchell being out more than you. You even gave everyone a sex ed class on how their absence causes an abscess in your lady bits.

    • Hey fucker, me lamenting over Greene and Mitchell doesn’t mean I want the Kings making stupid trades. We overpaid for a player we are probably going to lose in the offseason. That is why I am pissed. Now, if Robyn plays like a champ, stays healthy and is signed to a reasonable cap hit for 3 seasons, color me content. But have you noticed who else we have to sign WITH a declining cap? No? Take a look…then come back and tell me how we’re going to fit them and Regehr under the mother fucking cap.

      • OK, but you still haven’t answered my question.

        Forget next year, forget your fascination with the second round of the draft in 2014 and 2015, forget resigning Voynov and Brown and Clifford and replacing Penner, do you like Robyn Regehr on this defense for the remainder of the season and through the playoffs?

        • If I have to look past her ugly face, small tits, fat ass, shitty personality and each of her STDs, I don’t want to fuck her. I would rather bang the young hot bitches I have and keep this one back where the buffalo roam for someone else to shove his balls in her face.

          • You’re still just talking about draft picks and cap space. Stop being a Jew. Leave that to me and stick to hockey.

          • No your problem is that you arew complaining that she has an annoying voice, shitty personality, terrible friends, and a fuckedup family. None of that crap matters if all you are going to do is fuck her and leave her. Which is the plan, use Regehr for the season then move on. Because of this deal we get to go LH/RH DD/OD on all three lines in the playoffs. And yes we moved a couple of 2nd rounders, but we got to keep ours for this draft and that was the market rate. Is it an overpay? Yes, like $4/gallon of gas is an overpay; but fuck it I still gotta go to work so I’m gonna pay it! We still gotta replace Willie so fuck it we paid it.

          • Articulate and unambiguous

      • Actually, you should pray that Regher is gone next season. If he’s still here it means that Sutter has somehow gained some form of GM power…

  6. Fuckin A two 2nds is kinda tough to take for a 35 yr vet. I gotta have faith in that Lombardi guy right? He did finally do the nasty and got rid of TM and hired Sutter right? Then on the other hand he did pick up Ethan Moreau and Trent Hunter. Or did Hunter catch the greyhound out to LA thinking that if he didn’t make it out here there’s always gay porn?

    Assuming this Regehr guy plays like he does in the video, beats the shit outta everything that moves AND plays solid D, how can it not make the squad that much better?

    The Dallas game was ridiculous. I think all of them were on speed. Back to back, played less than 24 hours and they utterly dominated. 40-15 shot differential with the D squad we have now. It’ll be really Nice to have a D guy there that’ll beat the shit outta forwards again. Plus the guy wears Graf skates and that speaks volumes. :D

  7. Here’s my hypothesis….

    I’m pretty sure Greene was hurt well before the lockout. I know people who saw him walking, clearly in pain over, the summer. He probably thought (like Quick) that physical therapy would be enough to fix things up.

    Unlike Quick, he gave therapy a shot up until the last moment. But then came the lockout which meant he was not covered by the team’s insurance. So he had to wait for the lockout to end to have it fixed.

    Surly, could he have claimed workers’ comp and had the state pay for the cutting before the lockout was resolved?

  8. Toffoli already had his entry level slide one year (back in 11-12). That means whether he plays here or Manchester this counts as a year on his NHL contract.

    See: http://www.capgeek.com/player/1997

  9. Hey fellas! Settel down…Fuck the offseason, and fuck the regular season, its the post-season… The kings are what one of the three youngest teams right now. And the biggest! I can’t wait till the playoffs. This team is gonna fuck shit up!

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