In baseball, they should have a home run contest after the 9th inning.

In golf, if the players are tied at the end of the match…long drive or closest to the pin!

In basketball, free-throws of course.

In football…shit, I don’t know, they stand around for 2 hours and 45 minutes of a 3 hour game so a staring contest?

In soccer, penalty kick (the European version would be a gun fight between opposing fans, except the Italians can only bring knives to the gun fight)

The point is no other sport has done what hockey has done, which is to take a great game and infuse a one-on-one skills competition to decide the winner. And before one of you says, “would you rather have ties?” YES, I would, I was perfectly content with ties with no loser point. Winner gets two, loser gets nothing, and a tie, you split the two, it is logical and perfectly acceptable to any sane mind.

“WHY DO WE SUCK SO BADLY AT THE SHOOTOUT?” That one is actually easy. Jonathan Quick has little confidence and Bernier has always sucked at shootouts. A positional goalie who doesn’t rely on his reflexes doesn’t do well in these. Quick used to but this season’s Quick isn’t last season’s quick, not yet anyway.

As for the game, I think we dominated Anaheim. Their first goal was a lucky bounce off the idiot’s skate, the second goal was a cherry picking bullshit by the other idiot and the third goal was dumb bad luck by Bernier dropping it at the idiot’s stick. Contrary to those, we earned our three goals and we sustained the forecheck for half of the first and nearly the entire second and third.

To a man, the L.A. Kings played well (except for Keaton Ellerby, man he sucks donkey dick) and Doughty’s rocket that went off the post in the third (or was it OT?) could have and should have ended it but hockey, like life, is also dependent on luck and the Ducks were luckier than we were tonight so the undeserving imps walked away with the extra point.

Let’s make Dallas cry.

GO KINGS!