Two down. Two to go.
By the time you read this, I’ll be somewhere in the middle of nowhere on the 5 freeway, heading north to test my lucky underwear out at the HPV Pavillion in San Jose. I won’t be in a car though, with plenty of adrenaline still pumping from that marvelous win on Thursday, I think I’ll just run there.
The Shark Tank, as it’s known, if you’ve never been there, is a wonderful gymnasium. It is a loud mother of a building, however in much the same way the 15 kids cheering for the talent show in the gym at high school sounded really loud, the Fish Bowl benefits a great deal from acoustics.
If haven’t met a Sharks fan, keep it that way. They are a hostile bunch, and unfortunately my posse and I will have to watch our typically loose lips. Last time we ventured up there, a fight or two had to be quelled before people ended up in the hospital or a cell, and no one needs that shit.
I’d say something now like “this is not going to be an easy” game, but none of them are easy. The Sharks have almost always been quite a good home team, but when the puck hits the ice, that doesn’t mean much if the Kings can stick to their guns. Having played one game now without Stoll, there should be less of an adjustment period. While the Sharks will draw energy from the hometown fatties, so to will the Kings feed off the Sharks’ jump. You want to amp this up? Let’s amp the shit up.
It would be nice to win a few more faceoffs, what the Kings mainly need to do is clog up the middle of the ice. Frustrate the Sharks into making stupid passes. The most important key for me though against this team, which is so swift in transition and zippy with the stick to sticks, is to get every damn puck deep. I want the Sharks skating 200 feet every time they get the puck.
Toffoli gets his first goal tonight.
That deserves a couple prayers, don’t it?
Hail Kopi, full of talent,
Your fans are with thee.
Blessed are thou amongst Slovenians,
and blessed is the fruit of thy Slovenienness,
Holy Kopi, first of our centers,
Play for us screamers,
Now, and take us nearer to the hour of our Second Cup.
Our Kings, these reigning Stanley Cup Champions Kings, who art in the second round of the mother fucking playoffs,
Hallowed be thy game tonight.
Thy Kingdom come if thy wills will be done,
On their ice, because it’s not good for much else.
Give us this day our goals, however many are needed,
So that we may forgive ourselves for letting the Sharks think scoring three on Quick is anything other than a fluke.
And in the meantime give these dicks from San Jose a sound slapping.
That we may be led past the second round,
Past these ugly ass Sharks,
Let’s shatter glass and pierce our neighbor’s eardrums. Beat our chests and celebrate crisp passes, crushing blows and dance under flashing red lights.
Let’s go watch some damn Kings playoff hockey.
And go fucking nuts.
GO FUCKING NUTS!
GO KINGS GO!!!
Categories: L.A. Kings News