Why Not Slava?

Couldn’t sleep so…

Kopi, Gabby, Brownie
Pear, Cartsy, Top Titty
Kinger, Stolly, Stick
Cliffy, Richie, Lewie

Dewy, Muzz
Greener, Marty

Slava Voynov

Our Russian needs a nickname

Edit: stick tap to reader Christopher who pointed out Slava is his nickname. Actual name much longer and very Russian.

Now…we need one for McNabb.


Categories: Surly & Scribe Humor

Tags: ,

46 replies

  1. Because the vast majority of hockey nicknames suck balls?

  2. Technically ‘Slava’ is a nickname for Vyacheslav.

  3. How about Squirrelly or Scribbles? oh shit, sorry, those are already taken. I would go with Vee as in VV.

  4. Uhhh….”Slava” IS his nickname. Come on, guys, you should know this.

  5. I cant sleep either. The Chelyabinsk Champion? The Soviet Slapper? Nashs Nightmare? The Little D Man that Could? Just a few for now.

  6. Slava is as good for Vyacheslav as Gabby is for Gaborik. Or any of the others, for that matter. Maybe their’s something unique that he does where one could pull out a name.

  7. His full name is Vyacheslav Leonidovich Voynov. “Slava” seems like a good nickname for that mouthful.

  8. Andrei Loktionov didn’t get a QO! Guess the Canes really just wanted to dump Ruutu’s salary. I feel shocked Cotton.

  9. Listen geniuses, it’s not a hockey nickname unless it ends in the in “y”, “ie” or “er”.

    Slavy, Slaver (probably not a great idea), or bust.

  10. Drago

  11. Sounds too much like Jagenov.

  12. How about McPain for McNabb, he is big and loves to hit.

    • We can certainly go with that unless he proves to be a McPilon.

      Realistically, the entire team outside of TT and Stick should have new nicknames. The list provided in the OP is really just sad for a team that has won 2 Stanley Cup with most of these guys. Greener???? Really?!

      Did we traded away “The Professor” because he refused to go by Scrivy?

  13. Good luck in Florida WM.

  14. This is our biggest worry on opening day of free agency. Seriously, it is.

    *cue evil laugh.

  15. Congrats to WM on his retirement contract. Way to go dude. Perfect mentor for the kids down there, and he is actually worth the money still. If Erhoff gets 4? That’s what arbitration would bring. So good luck. Gotta admit I was a little worried he would end up in Pitt and actually give those fools a chance. I like the Cracknell signing, he is probably an upgrade to Nolan his price could knock a few guys off the roster, he is slotted as a RW, but I think he has played LW also. Make for a fun training camp. I’m going to Frozen Fury again this year. We should all convoy up there together.

  16. A great home for WM. We will face him twice a year, tops.

    In other FA news: Isn’t it fantastic to not otherwise give two shits?! I mean, how about this fucking team?!
    Also, DL is a frickin’ genius. Who would you rather have at ~$5M per year? Bolland or Gaborik?

    • I forgot Boland even played hockey after he left Chicago

      • With his injury issues he really hasn’t. $5.5M per over 5 years for a third line center! “But he’s gritty and a leader.”

        Well then FUCK, glad the Kings kept Richards so they could traded him for like 3 first rounders! Since he is only signed for one more year and 250K more per. Also, he played more than 23 games last year (in the playoffs alone). Like I get it, Tallon loves his former Blackhawks and “struggles” to get to the cap floor. (Okay that part I don’t fucking get. Gotta spend at least $51M, well we can go get $51M worth of talent, or overpay almost everyone to get to $51M then bitch about how there is no way to be competitive when you can’t spend “real money.” Lets go with the one where there is no job risk becuase there are no expectations!) Diatribe over, but this contract is fucking stupid. How is Legwand still unsigned?

  17. There’s been a glaring hole in the nickname lineup for some time now – we have Dewie and Lewie, but no Hewie. Does this bother no one else? I say give it to Slava.

  18. This is a fun place to go when you want a chuckle!! :-)

  19. With many thanks to Wikipedia, Cameron Crowe, Mark ‘Cutback’ Davis, Jim ‘Jungle Death’ Gerrard, Harold Ramis and all the Deltas for their inspiration, I give you the new nicknames for your two-time Stanley Cup Champion, Los Angeles Kings!!!

    Kopi – The Slovenian Straight Jacket
    Gabby – The Trenčín Twine Tickler
    Brownie – Freight Train / Tripod
    Pear – TP
    Cartsy – Jefe or Snatch
    Top Titty – Top Titty (or Titty if you’re into the whole brevity thing)
    Kinger – Kong
    Stolly – Belvedere (fuck that cheap shit)
    Stick – Stick
    Cliffy – The Colonel / Tradebait
    Richie – The Kenora Conundrum
    Lewie – Hewie
    Dewy – Doughnuts
    Muzz – Joliet
    Greener – Meat
    Marty – Jazz Hands
    Reggie – The Mad Mennonite
    Slava – Dragunov/Jagenov
    Schultz – Seargent
    McNabb – McPain/McPilon
    Adam Cracknell – The Kraken
    Jonathan Quick – The Scorpion
    Martin Jones – Splinter

    Reject lame ass nicknames with tacked on suffixes, coined by high school drop-outs! Your Kings deserve better!

  20. I cringe when I read Carter’s nicknames! Jefe or Snatch?

    “The Scorpion” is perfect for Quick!

    • Jefe is a response to those that promoted Jeffie. Snatch is short for Snatch Magnet. This is just a first cut and a work in progress. Additional ideas are welcome.

      • I understand, Skebo5150. It IS good to see positive interaction on Surly & Scribe. It’ll be a long summer without Kings hockey. And we need something to talk about!

  21. I always called him “Mother Russia”


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