Incompetent. That is what the refs and linesmen were tonight. A high stick that was actually called by the linesman (unless he lifted his arm to smell his pit) and which should have resulted in a whistle the moment the Stars touched the puck. A phantom interference call on Trevor Lewis where Lewis stopped and the Stars' player (whose name isn't important enough to remember) skated into … [Read more...]
As I Sit Here Naked, Thinking About Matt Greene…
April 18, 2013 By
Like the rumble of 570 horses beneath the hood. A smooth Aberlour, 16 year, neat. A right cross that lands flush on the jaw. And a woman who keeps her motor clean. I love Matt Greene. Surly called for boots projecting on asses. What we got was a terrific game and exactly what I needed after a 14 hour work day. First, the opponents. Actually, fuck the opponents, let's talk about … [Read more...]
Kari Lehtonen Isn’t Jesus…Kings Beat Stars 3-2
March 31, 2013 By
"Breathe"... "Breathe", I reminded myself. With 5 minutes left, I stopped listening. I am writing this post game on my way to heaven... I don't use the word dominate too often but that is exactly what we did to the Stars for the first 30 minutes. Give the Dallas Stars credit though. After Justin William's goal, they could have packed it in but they forechecked with three forwards and … [Read more...]
Losing Our Collective Shit – L.A. Kings Beat Blackhawks 5-4…and We Have Videos!
March 25, 2013 By
A real goaltending battle, eh? If Jonathan Quick made a big save, I missed it. If Corey Crawford didn't make a few big ones, we would have scored a snowman. Hockey Gods bless Johnny Oduya's perfectly shaped for a deflection, hard head. Kopitar, Stoll, King, Toffoli and Brown. On Stoll's goal, credit Slava Voynov for skating like the wind and giving Stoll the left side option which divided … [Read more...]
L.A. Kings Beat Phoenix Coyotes Who Help Beat Themselves 3-2. Morons Do As Morons Know.
March 19, 2013 By
"I scored that?" - Drew Doughty after he scored his 1st of the season. “It was just a collision. I didn’t really see him, and we clipped knees there. That’s all." - Jake Muzzin on the collision with Shane Doan. [Hits the ice like a bag of pucks] "My knee! Oh God, my knee! My vagina! No, no, I mean my knee! It really hurts!" [Realizes no penalty is being called, jumps on his skates, … [Read more...]
Phoenix @ Kings, Phoenix @ Kings
March 18, 2013 By
*mini update for 3/19 game* Bernier is in net! Well rotated goaltenders! *end mini update* I refuse to write two game threads for these games. We haven't even played them yet and I already find tonight and tomorrow against the Coyotes exasperating purely on principle. Seems Quick is in tonight, which is minimally acceptable only providing that Bernier plays tomorrow. Though my faith … [Read more...]
The Pope is an L.A. Kings Fan and Declares Anaheim is Infested with Protestants…
March 13, 2013 By
Once you have won a Stanley Cup, certain things should become irrelevant. Moments in team history well short of winning a Cup, the opinions of other team's fans who have not won a Cup, and former players who did not excel here doing well elsewhere. Andrew (I like that better anyway) Loktionov has 4 goals in his first 12 games. Darryl Sutter is pissed off and it has nothing to do with a … [Read more...]
Flame Retard…ant. Lucky Number 6
March 10, 2013 By
6 games and a Stanley Cup. 6 to 1 in game 6. Twice reaching 6 goals this season. Jake Muzzin scored a nice goal tonight. Kid has a snap shot, eh? Hey, what number does he wear? That's right. 6. When he scores again, he will have...6 goals. Slava Voynov was a beast. His offensive contributions from the blue line have been Drew Doughty like...back when Drew was racking up the points. … [Read more...]
Not So Fasth, Meatball. Kings Light up Ducks 5-2.
February 26, 2013 By
As hard as the zebras tried to give the Ducks an edge in this game, the Kings said no. First, a phantom tripping penalty against Dustin Brown and later a similar garbage call against Dwight King, the Kings gave up one powerplay goal out of those two. As far as I am concerned, this was a 5-1 victory. How's your head, Souray? Your face? How many blows did he take from our young stud, Jordan … [Read more...]
Sliding Down the Hallway – Kings Ice Oilers 3-1
February 19, 2013 By
Bullet point time... The Kings' defense did a much better job of gap control (the distance between our defense and their attacking forwards) and moved the puck quicker on transitions (the first pass and the speed of the forwards without the puck) compared to the last time we faced these annoyingly skilled whippersnappers. Jonathan Quick was sharp and made big and timely saves although that first … [Read more...]
Fuck…
February 2, 2013 By
Wife reminded me at the end of this game that I unintentionally broke tradition, one established last season. Before every Kings vs. Ducks, we dined at our favorite restaurant and I always ordered the duck...this time, we had guests and I forgot. Fuck. From that moment forward, everything sucked. Accident on the 57 freeway, backed up traffic, we were late to the game. My condolences to … [Read more...]
Drew Doughty, Post “Magic”
January 12, 2013 By
Lots going on in this picture...need a list of everything interesting you see or speculate about. … [Read more...]
Top 10 Ways Drew Doughty Will Celebrate Now That The District Attorney’s Office Won’t Charge Him
July 18, 2012 By
Drew Doughty has been found...actually he hasn't been found of anything. The L.A. District Attorney's Office has decided not to prosecute based on "insufficient evidence." That's good because prosecuting people for having consensual sex would leave a bad precedent and get a lot of us in trouble...present company included. So what does Drew do now? He celebrates. I put myself in his skates … [Read more...]
LA Kings @ New Jersey Devils Stanley Cup Finals Game 2 Open Forum – The More Things Change
June 2, 2012 By
Oh, game two of the Stanley Cup Finals, is that it? The Kings are up 1-0 on the road you say? Tonight they could go home to Los Angeles up 2-0... For the fourth time in a row? Fascinating. A guy could get used to this. So much has been written (finally) about the Kings. Both teams had jitters this, the ice was crappy that. Kovalchuk WILL be better. OK, so will Doughty. The Devils will make … [Read more...]
We’re Going To The Cup Finals – Reflection on The Game, The Airport And Video
May 23, 2012 By
Has it sunk in for you yet? I'm still in a daze, but a daze with the broadest of smiles worked into the fabric of my face. We're going to the Cup finals. My whole life I've wanted to go meet this team at the airport but I never knew where or when to go and never really had a great reason to since I've had a drivers license. Last night was perfect. The fervor. Watching that overtime with … [Read more...]
St. Louis Blues @ LA Kings Round 2 Game 3 Open Forum – Aggressor Defined
May 3, 2012 By
Coming home with a 2-0 series lead? Been there. Leaving Staples up 3-0? Done that. No reason we won't do it again. Though the St. Louis Blues will have something to say about it, people in St. Louis speak not with words but with... with... um... oh hell I don't care enough about the city to make a culturally relevant remark. They like curving, functionally meaningless architecture, … [Read more...]
LA Kings @ St. Louis Blues Round 2 Game 1 Open Forum – Puttin’ On The Foil
April 28, 2012 By
The time for games has ended. The time for foil has begun. Soon begins the Los Angeles Kings adventure into the second round, and beyond. Tonight marks the opening salvo in what I am positive will be as brutal, evenly fought and intense a series as the NHL will see this year. I've been wanting this matchup for a long time. I've waited for it. Now I get my wish. There will be blood. There … [Read more...]
For The First Time These Playoffs, Is It The L.A. Kings’ Series To Lose?
April 17, 2012 By
In 31 32 years of being a Kings fan, Surly is the only person I have met or known who is more intense than me while viewing a game. It's fun to watch. He's out of his mind. That may be why he was surprised when I told him before game 1 and confirmed it through that and game 2 how calm I was about this series. "It's Vancouver's series to lose", I told Jacob with a grin and I meant it. Why the hell … [Read more...]
That’s Exactly Right Drew…And For The Fans Too
April 14, 2012 By
Hammond gave us this from Drew Doughty: DOUGHTY: “We’ve just got to play as if the series if just starting and we’ve got home-ice advantage. It’s Game 1. We’re not up two-nothing. If anything, we’ve got to act like we’re down a couple (games). We can’t go in there relaxing, or taking them too easy, because they’re going to come even harder. This is going to be the hardest game … [Read more...]
A Lesson I Hope The Canucks Never Learn: Self-Important Arrogance Doesn’t Score Goals Or Stop Them
April 14, 2012 By
The Vancouver Canucks players can't help it. It's who they are. They, like the L.A. Kings, have never lifted the Cup but they carry themselves with an arrogance typically reserved for indignant pricks who have been handed undeserved success. It doesn't matter. On a macro or micro level, nothing that Canucks' players, including the cretin Alexandre Burrows, does before or after the whistle bears a … [Read more...]
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