This is another piece from newcomer Kelsey Eyes. Some of you asked what proves she knows anything about hockey. This article probably isn't that proof, but you also asked what a girl perspective brings, and this article definitely does that... Because like most of my experiences with women, I have no idea what the hell she is talking about and yet I still managed to enjoy it. **Note: This … [Read more...]
Unpopular Opinions About Regehr, Toffoli, Penner and Other Shit That May Piss You Off
April 1, 2013 By
"Warrior". We have used it in the past and I openly affixed it to Willie Mitchell before we first signed him and demanded we do so. Robyn Regehr...yeah, it's not coming to me. Look, I didn't start following hockey 4 years ago. It's been 3 decades. So go fuck yourself with the "but he's exactly what we need", "he's a defensive defenseman", "Greene and Mitchell are out", "my pussy hurts", I know … [Read more...]
Kari Lehtonen Isn’t Jesus…Kings Beat Stars 3-2
March 31, 2013 By
"Breathe"... "Breathe", I reminded myself. With 5 minutes left, I stopped listening. I am writing this post game on my way to heaven... I don't use the word dominate too often but that is exactly what we did to the Stars for the first 30 minutes. Give the Dallas Stars credit though. After Justin William's goal, they could have packed it in but they forechecked with three forwards and … [Read more...]
Put Dustin Penner on the 4th Line and Keep Him There
March 23, 2013 By
I swear it's not complicated...hard work, that is. You just do it. You get out there and outwork the opponent. When you are 6'5", 245 pounds, you already have an unfair advantage. It's called size. When you don't use it, you might as well be 5"10", 160...which is what I am...and I am not getting paid over 3 million dollars to play hockey. I didn't get to see the whole game against the Vancouver … [Read more...]
Bernier’s Stock, Richardson’s Freedom, Sutter’s Wisdom and Scribe’s Musings
March 22, 2013 By
The only person that has praised Jonathan Bernier's skill-set more than me is JT. For those of you who don't know JT...wait, that can't be any of you. Back in September of 2010, I did a full write-up on our Jonathans Quick and Bernier. If you didn't read us back then and want to learn about Bernier up and down (plus my own observations of his play), you owe it to yourself to click a link and grab … [Read more...]
L.A. Kings Beat Phoenix Coyotes Who Help Beat Themselves 3-2. Morons Do As Morons Know.
March 19, 2013 By
"I scored that?" - Drew Doughty after he scored his 1st of the season. “It was just a collision. I didn’t really see him, and we clipped knees there. That’s all." - Jake Muzzin on the collision with Shane Doan. [Hits the ice like a bag of pucks] "My knee! Oh God, my knee! My vagina! No, no, I mean my knee! It really hurts!" [Realizes no penalty is being called, jumps on his skates, … [Read more...]
PF+PM+S=Forward Formula for Success
March 10, 2013 By
What? You think Quisp is the only one who can add? That's my formula. I have written about it before but not in this way. You know how Lombardi likes to "balance" out each defensive pairing with a stay at home defenseman and offensive one? I like to see balance on all four lines of a Power Forward (PF), Playmaker (PM) and Sniper (S). Penner-Richards-Carter When Penner is on his … [Read more...]
Not So Fasth, Meatball. Kings Light up Ducks 5-2.
February 26, 2013 By
As hard as the zebras tried to give the Ducks an edge in this game, the Kings said no. First, a phantom tripping penalty against Dustin Brown and later a similar garbage call against Dwight King, the Kings gave up one powerplay goal out of those two. As far as I am concerned, this was a 5-1 victory. How's your head, Souray? Your face? How many blows did he take from our young stud, Jordan … [Read more...]
That Darryl Sutter is a Pretty Smart Hockey Guy
February 3, 2013 By
From Rich Hammond John Hoven Jon Rosen: On Justin Williams and veteran forwards: Sometimes, he just has to slow it down a little bit. Simon goes in and out during games. It’s an issue with two or three of our older guys. They can’t go in or out during games, or else we’re better off playing younger guys that are learning it. The whole thing – and again, I’m not singling Gagne or Willie … [Read more...]
Fuck…
February 2, 2013 By
Wife reminded me at the end of this game that I unintentionally broke tradition, one established last season. Before every Kings vs. Ducks, we dined at our favorite restaurant and I always ordered the duck...this time, we had guests and I forgot. Fuck. From that moment forward, everything sucked. Accident on the 57 freeway, backed up traffic, we were late to the game. My condolences to … [Read more...]
Bad Penner. Bad, Bad Penner.
January 9, 2013 By
ANAHEIM – Looking fit and trim with his salt-and-pepper beard already in playoff form, Scott Niedermayer was right at home on the Anaheim Ice surface with a bunch of familiar faces around him. Even Dustin Penner was wearing, of all things, a red Ducks practice sweater while skating with Ryan Getzlaf, Corey Perry and Teemu Selanne. Was this a mini-reunion of sorts for the 2007 Stanley Cup … [Read more...]
Survival Advice for the L.A. Kings Bandwagon Fans
August 16, 2012 By
My fellow Die-Hards, it's time you accept a fact. As Detroit has in herds as does Chicago and Pittsburgh, raising the Stanley Cup in Los Angeles will unearth fans who are new to the sport and will seek a sense of acceptance among us. They will not have felt our many years and decades of pain. They won't know the pit of darkness that accompanied the mantra, "the future is bright" as they have only … [Read more...]
The Dustin Penner Dilemma. To Sign or Not to Sign…from His Perspective.
June 30, 2012 By
I wish I was 6'4" and 240 pounds with a good stride and soft hands. I would pummel opposing forwards and defensemen and my ass would be planted in front of the goaltender every time we had the puck in the offensive zone. I would dare other defensemen to try and move me. In each zone, if someone so much as looked at Kopitar, Brown, Williams, Doughty or Voynov with a menacing glare, I would invite … [Read more...]
2012 Free Agency for the 2012 Stanley Cup Champions
June 21, 2012 By
Fellow puck fanatics, I am Andrew Elkins. I am an English Major at the University of Wisconsin, a hockey player, an impassioned supporter of our 2012 Stanley Cup Champions and a new blogger for Surly&Scribe. Thanks for the welcome. It's a pleasure to be here. Forgive me if I gloss over the pleasantries, but I thought I'd jump right in. Now that we have squandered several hours of our lives … [Read more...]
Have We Been Spoiled By This Playoff Run?
June 8, 2012 By
Wednesday night Darryl Sutter laughed at the notion that the Kings are somehow flawed for having not been able to close out the Devils in four games, as they have had similar trouble in two other potential close out game fours. It is laughable. This game is hard and that doesn't change just because for large portions of the playoffs the Kings have made it look easy. Dustin Penner suggested that … [Read more...]
We’re Going To The Cup Finals – Reflection on The Game, The Airport And Video
May 23, 2012 By
Has it sunk in for you yet? I'm still in a daze, but a daze with the broadest of smiles worked into the fabric of my face. We're going to the Cup finals. My whole life I've wanted to go meet this team at the airport but I never knew where or when to go and never really had a great reason to since I've had a drivers license. Last night was perfect. The fervor. Watching that overtime with … [Read more...]
L.A. Kings Euthanize Coyotes 4-0 And Expose Its Players For What They Are – Vermin
May 15, 2012 By
Suggested questions for Dave Tippet at the press conference: At some point, did you consider calling a timeout when your team started to completely self destruct? Would you consider the level of integrity left in the room after this game to be slim or none? Do you remember the exact moment in this game that you completely lost control of your team? The NHL owes Dustin Brown a formal … [Read more...]
LA Kings @ St. Louis Blues Round 2 Game 2 Open Forum – No Road Less Traveled
April 30, 2012 By
This is quickly becoming a familiar situation. A top team in the league goes into game 2 with the home ice advantage they worked so tirelessly throughout the season to gain nullified, behind the 8-ball, in desperate need of a win lest they go on the road without a win to their name. Meanwhile, the Kings enter tonight once again having won the rounds' first game, but riding not high on a kite … [Read more...]
L.A. Kings Take Game One 3-1 Over The St. Louis Blues. I Have Orgasm.
April 28, 2012 By
I stayed off Twitter today. I stayed away from the house during the first period. Instead, I hit a local bar and the tightly packed bartender, Talena, put on the game for me with a smile. It was admittedly odd watching it with the sound off but I enjoyed it because the C- commentary by NBC Sports out of my ear let me focus on the details. What I noticed is that St. Louis' offensive game is simple. … [Read more...]
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