“I'd like to play like Joe Thornton does right now. I try to mold my game around his. If you say four years, three years down the road, if I could be where he is, then I'd be pretty happy.” - Rick Nash. I remember the Joe Thornton trade well. 2005-2006 season. Both the Boston Bruins and San Jose Sharks were at or near the bottom of the league. It was Thornton, then as he is now, a premiere … [Read more...]
BLOWUP, BLOWOUT & BOOBS: SHARKS v. CANUCKS GAME 2 HAD EVERYTHING
May 18, 2011 By
7-3. A football score...and football sucks. This game didn't. Let's recap. Kevin Bieska beats Patrick Marleau up the ice for a goal. Patrick Marleau responds later in the game by starting a fight against Kevin Bieska...and getting pounded. Kevin Bieska finishes the game with a Gordie Howe hat trick. Joe Thornton responds during the game and after the Patrick Marleau fight by … [Read more...]
TOP 7 WAYS WE CAN HELP THE LA KINGS WIN GAME 6 AT STAPLES CENTER
April 23, 2011 By
Going into game 6, it's time to think outside the box. We are 2-1 in the goldfish bowl and 0-2 at home. Thus, I devised the following top 7 ideas to finally win a home game. 1. Boo the team and do that ignorant Beat LA chant. 2. Make Staples Center look like a high school gym. 3. Pretend Joe Thornton is captain material. 4. Do that stupid open and close Sharks' bite thing with our arms … [Read more...]
PUNCHING JOE THORNTON
April 18, 2011 By
I had a dream last night that I was punching Joe Thornton. We were on the ice, we played hockey, I punched him. He skated away, I pursued and punched him. Where he went, I went, punching him. He skated with the puck, I punched him. He passed it, I punched him. He attempted a shot, I punched him. All game...non stop. The game ended, I was still punching him. He skated off the ice to the locker … [Read more...]
TOP TEN WAYS L.A. CAN STEAL THE KINGS v. SHARKS SERIES
April 11, 2011 By
10. While the Kings have the puck but unable to get shots on net, David Courtney belts out over the mic "LOS ANGELES GOAL! His 26th goal and 2nd of the game, AN-ZE KOPITAR!" In the ensuing Sharks' confusion, all five Kings drive to the net and bang it home on the third attempt after missing the net two additional times. 9. Terry Murray fakes an epileptic seizure and falls on the ice during the … [Read more...]
LA KINGS POST GAME: KINGS BEAT SHARKS IN SHOOTOUT 4-3
March 24, 2011 By
I am not certain which was uglier - Joe Thornton's mug or the officiating. Let's compare. The morons in stripes called a phantom slashing penalty against Jarret Stoll (as a friend explained in a text, you can't "slash upward"), a second non-existent tripping penalty against Alec Martinez in the third period, missed several muggings behind the goal including a trip against Oscar Moller, … [Read more...]
KINGS PLAYS SHARKS GAME AND LOSE 6-3
November 15, 2010 By
Unfortunately, its true what they say about not being able to win them all. I'll keep this short, like my fuse at the moment. If you want to know about the scoring sheet and such, I encourage you to see the NHL.com recap. They have lots of pretty box scores, names and numbers. They will tell you who the Kings lost to and by how much. I will only tell you why. I said that the Kings … [Read more...]
CREEPING MYOPIA
November 5, 2010 By
It's more dangerous than socialism. Here is what Ron Wilson said after his team lost in a shootout to the Capitals: "I don't view it as a loss at all. I don't view shootouts as losses. It's you roll the dice on the ice." What? They aren't wins and the NHL doesn't have ties. That leaves one remaining category. This may be Wilson telling us he is in denial. That fact seems to run deep in that … [Read more...]
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