Everyone knows that Surly and I love statistics. Surly spends his spare time making spreadsheets about anything and everything. So naturally, when we heard about this article that touts our puck possession skills and calls our L.A. Kings all kinds of nice things, we had to post it. And this Adam Gretz guy doesn't suck...the writing was even half way decent. But seriously, his father couldn't … [Read more...]
So Long Andrei “The Not-So-Giant” Loktionov, Enjoy Newark
February 6, 2013 By
Per whatever source you feel like looking up, Andrei Loktionov was granted his request today when he was traded to the New Jersey Devils in exchange for the Devils 5th round draft pick. I have mixed feelings on this deal. I do believe that Loktionov is worth, or will be worth in the near future, much more than a 5th round pick (perhaps not coincidentally, it was in the 5th round that the Kings … [Read more...]
Kings @ Columbus – For The Sake Of It
February 5, 2013 By
Just win. For Scribe's sake. He's panicking. For Dean's sake. His trade position worsens by the loss. For Jack's sake. One more smug smile from him and his face may get stuck that way. For Carter's sake. He hates Columbus so. For Fuck's sake. Richards shouldn't be allowed to get laid until he scores. If only. Motivation is everything. Just win. GO KINGS … [Read more...]
Up Yours Superbowl – Let’s Talk About L.A. Kings and Western Conference Hockey
February 3, 2013 By
Do you know what I hate about football? Everything. Every fucking thing about this sport. It's not just because I am a hockey fanatic. It's because football is a fraud. You see, baseball at least calls itself America's pastime. Baseball therefore has the integrity to admit it is designed for lazy fucks who sit around and get fatter on hotdogs and beer while watching grown men throw a ball … [Read more...]
Fuck All of You Who Sent Emails…and We Love You
February 3, 2013 By
Surly and I come up with this idea to give rings, at cost, to diehard L.A. Kings fans who just happen to be diehard S&S readers, focusing on those who are out of State or cannot get one of their own. Surly writes the post, I set aside 5 rings and so does he. 10. That's what we got. "We'll get a few emails. Should be easy enough..." I think. I go through what feels like 100 … [Read more...]
Futzing Down The Freeway – Kings @ Ducks Game Thread
February 2, 2013 By
First of all, Bobby and I are busy scouring through your emails, trying to decide who will get the replica rings. Bate your breath for a little while longer. I know, I know, the wait is excruciating. So is choosing. Now, onto the game tonight that I won't be watching because I had the brilliant idea to take my woman to Ojai for her birthday before consulting the Kings' schedule. I suppose once a … [Read more...]
Replica Stanley Cup Rings For All – Don’t Pay $70 On Ebay
February 1, 2013 By
UPDATE 2/5/13: THERE ARE NO MORE RINGS. I have emailed those we can send one to, so please, if you are just finding this post now, do not email me. Sorry we could not give one to everyone, but there are a lot of you! And you (almost) all deserve one! I am still getting to replying to everyone, which I promised I would individually. Thanks for all your emails and kind words about the … [Read more...]
Geography Be Damned – Kings vs Predators
January 31, 2013 By
Busy day so I need to make this quick. There once was a team from Nantucket, Whose fan base you could fit in a bucket Their gold was our pewter So they lost Ryan Suter And that's when Shea Weber said "Fuck it." Prediction for the game... Kings will only score one goal. Kings will win. GO KINGS GO! … [Read more...]
Kings Finger Vancouver on Ring Night, Beat Canucks 3-2 in a Shootout.
January 29, 2013 By
I haven't yet read Jacob's pregame. He told me he predicted a Vancouver Canucks victory. I know, I know, what the fuck is wrong with him, right? He gets one final score right against the Edmonton Oilers and the Surly one thinks he is Nostradamus. Except Jacob sucks at it. Maybe tonight's victory against the Nucks will get Jacob to stop predicting losses and get back to what he is good … [Read more...]
The Home Opener About A Hockey Game – Kings vs Canucks
January 28, 2013 By
My father used to say to me "Jacob, just 'cause you killed a pig don't mean you've got bacon." Actually, I don't think that was my father. It was a girl I dated from Kentucky... something to do with our lovemaking... we had just watched Deliverance, anyways, the point is that the Sedin brothers look like pig shit. Or maybe it's that one win isn't enough. Sure we beat Phoenix and that was fun, … [Read more...]
Angry? Kick The Dog – Kings @ Coyotes Game Talk
January 26, 2013 By
*Ring* *Ring* (I haven't figured out yet how to put the Beverly Hills Cop theme as my ringtone on my iPhone) *Ring* *Ring* (Swipe) "Hello?" "I need you to do me a favor." "What?" "Write a prayer. The hockey gods are angry." "For you Bobby, well... For you very little, but for the hockey gods, sure. Now leave me alone. I'm trying on shoes and am very confused." (end) Our Kings, whose fans … [Read more...]
Kings @ Oilers Game Thread
January 24, 2013 By
Scribe thinks I'm panicking. Scribe also wishes he had my good looks, so he often likes to pretend what he's thinking is what I'm thinking, hoping for some sort of reciprocal thought-to-looks transference. Want to know how much I'm panicking? I think the Kings will lose tonight. And that's fine. Matt over at Life In Hockeywood asked me and a few other nutbags to participate in a prediction … [Read more...]
Kings @ Colorado – The “Let’s Hope It’s a Hockey Game” Game Thread
January 21, 2013 By
So Saturday we saw the championship banner raised, but we were deprived of seeing our first Kings hockey game. We saw something, I just wouldn't really call it hockey. I could call it several things... hilarious, depressing, spastic, but it didn't qualify as hockey anymore than several sweaty men dry humping each other qualifies as football. And that's OK (not the dry humping, either take off … [Read more...]
Being A Kings Fan – Chapter 2
January 18, 2013 By
Well folks, its almost here, the day we've all been waiting for. The banner gets raised tomorrow, but that is merely incidental. When the Kings take the ice against the Chicago Blackhawks they skate for the first time as champions. For the first time, we as fans can look to the past and smile without the hesitation of memories balanced on pillars of compromise. "The 'Miracle on Manchester' … [Read more...]
And Just Like That, What? Forgiveness?
January 6, 2013 By
My fiancé is going to be upset. She's still asleep, it's our last day before returning to work after a pleasant winter vacation, so she's allowed one last day to hibernate. For the past six months she's had someone special in her life. A man who is home at 6pm. A man who takes her out to dinner, watches movies, listens to her prattle on about her day. She's had someone there to laugh when she … [Read more...]
Merry Christmas to Me, To You, To Every Gentile and Jew…
December 24, 2012 By
We have much for which to be thankful. Our L.A. Kings family earned a reward worthy of enduring praise. My fellow die-hards and I basked in the glorious vision of our captain and team raising the Stanley Cup on our home ice, forever fixing their names as Champions. Be it a decade or more of disappointment and trial we endured, all of it transformed at a moment's notice to a prize well worth the … [Read more...]
David Courtney Mourned By A Fan, and a Friend
November 29, 2012 By
Today, a city grieves. Bobby and I have many great things to say about David Courtney, the voice of the Los Angeles Kings home games, who passed away today. The sadness of this news weighs heavy in our hearts on this appropriately gloomy day. But while we were David's fans, my father was his friend. It was with great sorrow and a lump in my throat that I called him this afternoon with the … [Read more...]
Recent Comments